Being Reasonable and Other Western Affectations

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Recently there has been a change in one of the groups that I am involved in. The group is predominantly white, with a few activists of color mixed in. There had been talk about making the group more color friendly, and it continues, but these talks are usually glacial with flares as tempers rise, egos get bruised and people are forced to look at themselves and at others differently. Currently such a flare is going on. involving friends and acquaintances of mine. It is not much fun. There is a lot of finger-pointing and gnashing of teeth. Very boring.

I was talking to an acquaintance about an event that we might meet at and I mentioned of course I be there so and so is going to be performing and I wouldn't miss it for the world. Said acquaintance starts talking about problems with performer, etc, etc and being hurt, and not talking. I stopped her cold and just said 'I am not discussing this'. She continues. I repeat 'I am not discussing this'. She starts to repeat and I say testily 'I am not discussing this'. 'Oh I know you are on her side', she says, 'and...'. 'No and', I bark, 'I know English is my third language but can we at least agree that I am being understood?' Ahh, yes. Condescension. It's been so long I think I missed you. Of course she is pissed now, 'Don't give me that crap. English might be your third language but you have mastered that pretty well!' That told me! No wait. It didn't. 'If I mastered it so well then why does it take me three times to say I don't want to fucking talk about it and you don't get the point?'

Announcer:

Samir Sosa of the Steamed Penguins is at bat. The bases are loaded. Tensions are high. The pitcher winds up and lets fly... It is a fastball, relentless, driving straight for the batter but Samir hammers that ball and boom! It flies right out of the ballpark. That is one great homerun ladies and gentlemen.

Let's examine the lesson here, shall we?

I know in Western society things are discussed calmly and quietly and rationally. That's all very cute. Back where I come from you disagree, you do it loudly. You do it rudely. You involve peoples' ancestry, their parents sexual proclivities, and how ugly their children look because their dog was, apparently, horny, and that is for polite disputes. Real problems are reduced to the lowest common denominator through a simple process of applying pressure on the skulls and bodies of the parties to the problem. The party that is more resistant to pressure obviously has the better arguments.

Now, unless you derive some insane pleasure of watching stereotypes dance around, how about we stick to playing by your rules and when crazy Arab boy says "I don't want to talk about it" in a civilized, dignified, rational and quiet manner then you take that at face value. Otherwise you end up with a hairy, wild-eyed, loud, gesticulating Arab in your face, and nobody finds that experience to be a pleasure.